Reverent Fear

I am not a fan of fear. I don’t like being afraid or fearful. I like feeling confident and bold. I like the feeling of control and the calm that can come with control. I have learned (over and over) that control is often a mirage or misconception. I actually have very little control over some of the big events that can happen. I did manage to graduate high school and get a diploma. I also made it through college and graduate school with degrees. I do believe that accomplishment is important and significant. I can’t control cancer in my family. I can’t control accidents that can change my whole life in an instant. In fact, in light of some of my suffering and struggle, my accomplishments feel really small.

A couple of weeks ago, my pastor, Shannon Lovelady said, “We fear what we worship, and we worship what we fear”.  I took note of that and really started wrestling with that. I believe it’s a true statement even though I don’t really like hearing it. I do have a reverent fear of God. I believe that this level of “fear” is more respect than how I would normally define fear. I see God as “Abba” – a warm child/parent relationship. I believe this is His heart and His desire is that my heart be devoted to Him.  I started reading through Psalms yesterday and I’m looking forward to the perspective on God, the Creator and Father of all. Check this out….

¹¹ Serve the Lord with reverent fear,
    and rejoice with trembling.
¹² Submit to God’s royal son, or he will become angry,
    and you will be destroyed in the midst of all your activities—
for his anger flares up in an instant.
    But what joy for all who take refuge in him! (Psalm 2:11-12 NLT)

I do believe that God is a God of Justice. I also believe He’s a God of Grace & Mercy. In the Old Testament (under the old covenant), He appears to be about the Law. The Old Testament points to the coming of Jesus. When Jesus comes, He brings with Him Grace & Mercy. God’s Justice doesn’t disappear, but it is tempered with Grace & Mercy. I will admit that when I first became a Christian, I was afraid of going to hell MORE than I was excited about going to heaven. I felt like it was a “no-brainer” to choose Christ for life. As I’ve got to know the Lord by walking with Him and studying His Word, I follow Him out of faith instead of fear. My fear is most definitely more reverent and respectful, but also very intimate. I disagree with those who say that we should never question God. I believe that He is the Author of my questions. I believe that questions are “teachable moments”.  I love the last line of this Psalm – “…what joy for all who take refuge in Him!”

I do want to follow Him each day. I want to discuss everyday events with Him. I want His Wisdom and Counsel on the simplest of decisions. I want His Presence to be all over and inside and out of my life. I respect His Presence. I respect His Guidance. I want to worship ONLY God. I don’t want to fear what this life holds or doesn’t hold. I want to keep my eye on the “long game” of eternal life with Him. I don’t want to be fearful of that at all.

Pressing On!

Dwayne