Zimbabwe
Blog by Kristen Hicks
One thing I have learned about the Lord is that when He shows me something, He fully intends to do it. He is never a tease. He is never uncertain. He is sure—sovereign. He’s just looking for me to believe Him—for submission, for faith, for surrender, for trust. He is looking at my heart. Am I seeking Him for His hand or for His heart—to know Him and be fully known by Him.
About 4 or 5 years ago, I was sitting at church, listening to this sweet man from Zimbabwe. He was a doctor and he was telling us about his mission. He worked at a hospital, delivering babies and he was looking for help to build a space for the women to come and stay when they were in their third trimester. Most of them had to walk for miles to get to the hospital. Can you imagine being 9 months pregnant and having to walk to the hospital while you’re in labor? Yea, no, that ain’t happening for anyone. When we closed our eyes to pray that night, I suddenly felt like I was there, with the women, sitting in a circle and I was singing over them. I knew the Lord was showing me something that He wanted to do. A group from the church decided to go— I decided to go with them. After starting the preparation to go, I found myself in quite a mess, for lack of better words, and it pulled me away from not only the trip but the church as well. However, I held on to what the Lord had shown me and I reached out to my friend in Alabama, who was the contact for the trip. I told him about what the Lord had shown me and he told me he would let me know the next time he went so I could possibly go with him.
Over the last several years since then, I have gone through some of the craziest things with the Lord. Moments that will forever be held close— moments of healing, moments of understanding and clarity, moments of just being held and allowing Abba to define me and tell me who I really am. I am learning that it’s in the secret place that I am built. I am taught how to love because I have been loved there. I have received love and believed LOVE in that place. I have been taught to praise, throughout every single season because I have seen Him work and move and He has shown Me who He is and what He can do firsthand. Only in the secret place. I have learned to fight, not only for myself but for others, because I have learned to lean into Him and let Him fight for me. I have learned so many other things since the first time that I felt led to go to Zimbabwe. And although it has taken so many years for it to happen, I can’t overlook the faithfulness and grace of Jesus to get me there. And I can’t help but be filled with joy in knowing that now, I am way more ready to go than I was then. Because I have gained more of Him in the places that no one sees. Because my love for Him has grown and shaped and defined my whole being and life And now I can carry and share a piece of His heart just as He showed back then. I can pour out His love because He has poured out His love to me. He doesn’t waste time and His timing is perfect. Always.
As I began the process of raising money for this trip, I found myself caught in an interesting place with a couple of my siblings. My brother, Matthew, had just begun his process of raising money for an internship with Christian Campus Fellowship at West Georgia. Then on another end, my sister, Katie, had started fundraising for her 9month mission trip with Adventures in Missions. So I felt like I was little stuck. Not wanting to write letters, not wanting to double up on people, not wanting to take away from anything Matthew and Katie might get. It was then that I went before the Lord and for the first time ever, I felt Him release me to record an album.
This was a huge deal, and because I was so excited about it, I started running with it at my own pace. That only led to feeling overwhelmed and anxious. Then one morning the Lord made it clear about what He wanted me to do. Which is what led me to record “The Barn” album. (For more of that story click here.)
All of that brings me to this. I am still a little short on some funds. I am believing God for them though. I have trusted Him to be my Provider for a long time and I know He is able. I know He is just wanting me to ask Him, to be in obedience and to trust Him. I felt like He wanted to tell this story. Not to try and pull on your heart strings but simply because He loves a good story. He loves testimony and showing Himself strong in impossible situations. Why? Because He Himself IS LOVE. It’s not an emotion for Him. It’s not a feeling or an act. It’s just simply who He is. And He loves bringing people together in the Fullness of Himself as Love. So I am certain, I am going to Zimbabwe and I am going to sing over/with/through all those beautiful women that He just loves and wants to love on. I am sure, that He can speak clearly to those of you that He wants to use to encourage me. That’s just how it all works, we receive from Him, in whatever form that looks—love, compassion, provision, mercy, grace— so we can pour out to others. Of this, I am certain of this I am sure. Love you guys!
*If you do feel led to give to my trip here is a link to my go-fund-me site. God bless!!! https://www.gofundme.com/5d4sw7k