Broken
I do remember what it feels like to be beat down and broken because of events that happen that are completely beyond my control. I have felt absolutely helpless to fix or repair the damage done. I have come to accept that there are accidents and events that happen that I have absolutely zero control over. I sometimes wish that I could see those events on the horizon but that’s not exactly how it works. I’ve had my heart broken into millions of pieces, or so it seems. The Lord is able to restore my broken heart for sure.
I started reading the book of Job this morning and in the background, he was a proud and grateful man for his family and all that the Lord had blessed him with. The Lord had complete confidence in Job that He allowed Satan to test him with suffering. He had four messengers come him, one right after the other with waves of bad news. The first three messengers told of the loss of his livestock and possessions. The fourth messengers told of the loss of his children. That was the point when Job was broken down. I wasn’t really expecting Job’s response though. Check this out…
20 At this, Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship 21 and said:
‘Naked I came from my mother’s womb,
and naked I shall depart.
The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away;
may the name of the Lord be praised.’
22 In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing. (Job 1:20-22 NIV)
There are times when my brokenness feels like I’m totally destroyed. In the midst of my pain and suffering, I can’t see what life could look like getting beyond this pain. I think it’s like being in the fog, when it’s so thick and dense that I can’t see through it. When the fog clears, I can then see clearly. I see brokenness and suffering like this fog – the Lord provides the directions through the fog if I will just trust Him.
Job’s response of worship is powerful and shows incredible discipline and trust in the Lord. I suspect that worship was a part of his everyday life as it should be in my life. Job is about to “go to school” and learn more about God through this suffering and loss. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; I believe God teaches us things about Himself through suffering that I’m not sure we could learn any other way. I want my daily journey with the Lord to build worship and trust into the structure of my life – into my DNA. I want my life to be totally dependent upon the Lord. I know that my faith needs to grow and the Lord helps me with that too. Brokenness is beautiful when the Lord is in charge of rebuilding.
Pressing On!
Dwayne