Blog by Kristen Hicks
My heart is breaking over this. Yet, at the very same time it feels numb, confused even… unsure.
What is this word? Does anyone out there know anymore? Can anyone show it to me? I’m beginning to wonder if the true sense of this word even exists in our culture.
Everyone is searching… everyone. Some have settled, some are playing the game, some say they have arrived, some are happy but not full. Something always seems to be missing. There has got to be more.
This word keeps coming up in my life lately. Mostly, when pertaining to identity, purpose and purity. These are my thought processes:
Identity: This is who I am and this is who I am not. Who am I letting define me? What am I allowing to shape my view of myself? What is the filter? Where are the lines? What lies am I believing?
Purpose: This is what I was created to do. This is what I want to do. This is what I need to do. This is what I have to do. This is my fate. This is my destiny. This is my calling.
Purity: Innocence. Sheltered. Naive. Cute. Child-Like. Can’t have sex until marriage. Unattractive. No fun. Not wanted. White. Light. Bride. Marriage.
Yes, I am very much aware that some of these thoughts are tainted, misunderstood and twisted. I realize that the Lord has already done some great healing and correcting in some of these— yet, there is still more work to do.
It’s interesting, don’t you think? Assuming I am not the only one out there that thinks like this, how do we get to these places? Who in the world led us to such conclusions?
These words have been the forefront of my questions to the Lord. Some of you, may have already picked up on this. “Who am I? Who are You, Lord? What was I created to do? What is purity, really? Purity of heart, purity of soul, purity in friendships, relationships, all of it.”
I am noticing that as these questions arise in my heart, the Lord always points me back to worth.
He often uses this example with me: People who are trained in finding counterfeit money, don’t study the counterfeit—they study the real thing. In the same way, you can not find the truth about your worth, identity, purpose or purity by looking at the counterfeit. You are never going to find your answers in looking at the world, comparing yourself to others, nor letting someone else define you. Yes, the weight of words are powerful. Yes, the pull of culture and social norm is super convincing. And yes, it does seem like Positive Polly, over there, has it all figured out.
Truth? Those are all lies. They are counterfeits— made to look like something real, made to look like something that is of worth. Those lies are crafted, down to the very detail, and then planted in a very specific place— some even among truth. They are camouflaged, waiting for an opportune moment to strike and make a fool out of you. But make no mistake the end has already been determined.
My hands-down, absolute favorite, Christmas song is “Oh, Holy Night.” Why? Because of one simple line:
“Then He appeared and the soul felt it’s worth.”
You could literally take the entire gospel and sum it up with this line. He (True Love) appeared and suddenly I find myself, realizing that there is more. Suddenly, I realize that everything and anything that isn’t defined by HIM, by THIS LOVE…is simply a lie.
It’s like He says:
“For what it’s worth, I would do it all over again. Again and again and again. Over and over and over, I would give my life. For what it’s worth, I see you! I choose you! You are Mine! You are beautiful! For what it’s worth, I have plan, a calling, a purpose for your life. For what it’s worth I won’t leave. I won’t let you go. For what it’s worth, you are set completely free. You are whole. You are made new. You are forgiven. You are who I say you are. Because the TRUTH is, YOU, yes YOU are WORTH IT!!!!!”
This is hard to understand. This is hard to walk out. But I am becoming convinced, the more that we look ourselves in the mirror, or better yet, in the reflection of the eyes of Jesus, and come into agreement with what He sees—when we allow His Word to define us— when we really believe that He is exactly who He says He is— and when we allow ourselves to receive the TRUE, untainted, purest LOVE that He so freely pours out on us— THEN, and only then, can we live in the freedom of identity, purpose and purity.
And for what it’s worth, you are worthy of knowing Him as LOVE.
I keep listening to this song, so I thought I’d post it along with this blog. Let it wash over you! Love you guys!