Waiting

Blog by Kristen Hicks

This is one of those words. Yes, you know the words I’m talking about. Those words no one wants to ever speak of. “Shhh, if you don’t say it, it doesn’t actually exist; you don’t actually have to do it.” Usually, this word is attached to the word patience. Oh, snap! Heaven forbids, anyone ever prays for patience. I get it. I’ve been there, done that, and yep, it’s looking like I’m back again.

Waiting.

Does anyone out there ever feel like you have spent your entire life waiting? Or is it just me? So unfair, am I right? What could waiting possibly be doing for us? Waiting to graduate, waiting to get that one job, waiting for that one person, waiting to start a family. Waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting. And that’s not even all of it.

This is a normal response, and I’m pretty sure no one ever actually enjoys it, especially when we are right smack dab in the middle of it. It’s gruesome, agonizing, dreadful, painful to even think about; yes, all of the words that describe what it’s like to die very, very slowly. I think we can all come into agreement and in unison let out a loud, grumbling “UGH!”

I know I’m being a little overly dramatic, it’s fine; but if I’m honest, this is how I really feel about it all on the inside.

Stuck. This is a great word to describe it. You’re just stuck until the wait is over. “What are you really doing in this process, Lord?”

Take a minute and listen to even just the first part of this video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cGujUgvP_LY&t=1251s

“Patience is what we do while we wait…. While we wait, we praise… There is something that shifts when we simply decide Jesus.”

I listened to this video months ago and since then I’ve listened to it several times over. Just letting it speak into me. Allowing the truth of what she said to take hold of not just my understanding, not just my thoughts, but my heart and soul. I feel like I’m just now beginning to scratch the surface of this.

I’ve been finding myself in the Psalms. I think because David knew how to wait better than anyone. Or maybe, because he wrote out his heart in songs, he just knew how to express it better.

Psalm 5:3 “Listen to my voice in the morning, Lord. Each morning I bring my requests to you and wait expectantly.”

Psalm 27:14, “Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.”

Psalm 37:7 “Be still in the Presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for Him to act. Don’t worry about evil people who prosper or fret about their wicked schemes.”

Psalm 59: 9 “You are my strength; I wait for you to rescue me, for You, O God, are my fortress.”

Psalm 62: 1, “I wait quietly before God, for my victory come from Him.”

Psalm 62: 5, “Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in Him.”

Once again, I am reminded that the Lord is in the process of our hearts. He isn’t just looking to use you. You aren’t just some pawn in a game of chess between Him and satan. He’s already won that match once and for all, and let’s just be honest, it wasn’t really much of a match.

Also, the Lord doesn’t put us through processes just to get more out of us. This one has taken me quite some time to claim for myself, and if I’m honest, this is the song I’m singing over myself at the moment. The song that He loves me and doesn’t intentionally hurt me in order to get more out of me. With that mindset what I find, I’m left with is just a lot of disappointment in myself; I can never measure up; I am never enough.

The truth is that He makes us wait, He puts us through processes and encourages us to pray for patience because what happens is it ends up producing more of Himself in us; not more of us in us; more of Him in us. 

Look back at those verses.

Waiting brings an expectation for Him to simply come. It produces confidence, bravery, and courage. It brings us into the Presence of a God who loves us and sees us and who has the power to move and act in ways that are beyond us and in ways that we ourselves can’t. Waiting shifts our entire being to the posture of allowing Him to be our strength, our rescuer, our fortress, our victory, and our Hope. 

My favorite is that last one. Our Hope. We tend to put our hope in all the things we are actually waiting on. We think that those things are the things that are going to complete us, make us feel whole, change our life for the better, overcome once and for all. But that is a false truth.

The truth is the Lord loves us enough to not let us lie in the deception of the world. So now I am convinced of something; His gift to us… Waiting. Waiting until, our eyes are opened, until our hearts are healed, until we believe Him, come into agreement with Him. Waiting until the fruit of who He is, is produced, pruned and ready for harvest in us. Waiting until He becomes our everything: strength, courage, confidence, bravery, rescuer, fortress, victory, and our hope.

So, while I wait I will praise. And I will wait until I realize I am His.