I don’t really consider myself a “prayer warrior”, but I really want to be. I do pray often, but I feel like I’ve got much to learn regarding prayer. I’m still learning to pray about everything and worry about nothing. I want to have a consistent prayer journey with the Lord where I talk with Him throughout the day about every facet of my day and my life. I want to talk with Him during the menial, mundane tasks, like brushing my teeth, going to the bathroom, answering email, texts, etc.…
A healthy prayer life involves a lot of listening as well as talking. I’ve become a better listener with the Lord over the years. I’ve learned to pray with more depth of purpose, since learning to listen to Him. He speaks through silence. He speaks through loud people. He speaks through quiet people. He speaks in the nature. He speaks in the sunrise and sunset. He speaks in the smile of a child. He speaks more ways and in more situations than I could possibly count.
I do recall some prayers that are hard to pray. Jesus prayed a “hard prayer”, the night of His betrayal. He was troubled in spirit, because He knew what was coming. Check this out…
32 They went to the olive grove called Gethsemane, and Jesus said, “Sit here while I go and pray.” 33 He took Peter, James, and John with him, and he became deeply troubled and distressed. 34 He told them, “My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.”
35 He went on a little farther and fell to the ground. He prayed that, if it were possible, the awful hour awaiting him might pass him by. 36 “Abba, Father,” he cried out, “everything is possible for you. Please take this cup of suffering away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.” (Mark 14:32-36 NLT)
I don’t always “want” the Lord’s will. I usually want what I want. I can be selfish at the expense of others. I will sometimes complain if I don’t get what I want. I have learned that complaining really means I feel “entitled” to something. I think entitlement is a big issue in our culture today. I feel entitled to things that I really should earn. I often act like; others life should revolve around mine. It is really hard to pray: “Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.” I’ve sat beside the bed of a friend as their loved ones prayed this prayer, only to have them die within in hours. I will passionately pray for what I want for hours on end, because I feel like to pray for “His will to be done” might end badly. I can’t always see what He sees. I can just see the here and now. The Lord see there and then – the future. I’m learning that He always know what is best. He always knows exactly what I need. In order for me to grow and mature in my faith, I need to have a child-like trust in Him. I need to pray for His will above mine, every time I pray. That is easier said than done, but I’m trying.